A few weeks ago I read several books by women who have developed techniques to effectively work with dominant men.
When I got those books, Amazon recommended that I also consider getting What Men Don't Tell Women About Business: Opening up the Heavily Guarded Alpha Male Playbook
Have any men read this? Is it accurate? Do you really feel this way? Oh wait, I've just lost all of my credibility by asking. Darn.
I found this book to be simultaneously both incredibly illuminating and highly disturbing. On the one hand, the author states multiple times that (alpha) women are the perfect people to become the leaders of today's companies. And yet, within his framework, these same women will always be subordinate to not only the alpha males but also the beta males in the group.
In spite of my discomfort with some of the theories and recommendations put forth in this book, it is written in such a way as to be actionable. Further, it gives very specific examples of behaviors that undermine one's power or will cause one to be "deep sixed." What does it mean to Deep Six someone? "The is the process we use to sabotage your credibility and your career. It comes from underwater (you rarely see it coming), and it has a devastating effect on your position in business."
I need to reread this book, and take notes, as there seem to be two major themes. The easy to swallow theme deals with productivity, professionalism and providing superior value - core ideas in any business book. The other theme seems largely built around loyalty, trust, keeping secrets, and not damaging the surprisingly fragile egos of the alpha males. It seems like the primary cause of getting yourself deep sixed is apparently a careless word that cracks the foundation of the fragile male ego. And woe to the woman who inadvertently provokes the wimpy beta male. Let the games begin, only the woman must wage her war ever so cleverly. Actually perhaps she should just start looking for a job out of state. It seems men can dish out and take criticism from each other, but a women who offers up constructive feedback to a man even when asked, even to a subordinate, risks provoking war and paying the price for damaging the male ego.
Fascinating. I always thought alpha men were hardier creatures than this.
One of my favorite things about Amazon is that books are recommended based on your browsing history or prior purchases. I read a lot of business books - generally themed toward entrepreneurship & innovation or management. Recently I've been reading more books targeted to women in management positions in male dominated organizations. And speaking of books, I really want a Kindle
The two I've read most recently The Corporate Dominatrix: Six Roles to Play to Get your Way at Work
Now granted, in Seducing the Boys Club, the S & M is defined as "Seduce and Manipulate" and is an autobiographical history of one woman's rise to the top of her company. This book is entertaining and filled with advice and suggestions. Some of it the advice is so over the top I found myself laughing, often. Here's an example:
"One of the great tools, or weapons, we have as women is flirting, and men always respond well to positive attention. If you know you are going to a contentious meeting with a man, you can defuse his anger before he even opens his mouth. Unless he is morbidly obese, there is no man on earth who won't puff up at this sentence:
"Wow, you look great. Been working out?"
Or if you "accidentally" touch a man's arm while you are talking about something serious, you can interrupt yourself with a quick show of admiration:
"Wow, your arm is like steel. Been working out?"
I know, I know, it's obvious and underhanded, but is always works."
Um, you've got to be kidding me.
My favorite parts of this book are where the author shares her missteps - what the situation was and how she handled it badly. Almost always, she will share how she turned it around - a process that might have taken weeks, months or years. These are truly illuminating case studies, almost all written in the humorous tone above.
The corporate dominatrix is written in a more traditional way, and is built around the more common definition of S & M. The goal is to not become either sadistic or masochistic but to use the lessons of S&M to become an effective corporate dominatrix.
What are the characteristics of a Corporate Dominatrix you might ask?
Who doesn't want to be her!
The author defines six common fantasy archetypes to discuss when each management style (and what type of power to use) would be most appropriate so that one can become a "Corporate Dominatrix".
These are:
This framework is interesting and useful. Most of us have a preferred archetype or three with which we are most comfortable with the others underdeveloped. I definitely have a few I need to work on. I called a mentor a few weeks ago for advice. I was getting ready for a meeting and knew my inner Amazon was ready to do battle but I also knew she was absolutely NOT the archetype who was needed for the meeting. I had not yet read this book, but I can now see that my mentor was trying to persuade my inner Amazon to become a Queen for the meeting. Interesting.
I just finished The Illusions of Entrepreneurship: The Costly Myths That Entrepreneurs, Investors, and Policy Makers Live By
It's a terrific scholarly work that shattered some of my illusions of entrepreneurship. Scott crushes 67 myths or shares 67 truths depending on your perspective.
Let's start with #1: America is NOT becoming more entrepreneurial. The rate of start-up creation has been declining over the last 20 years. This ties to #2 - there are many countries that are much more entrepreneurial than the USA.
A few things surprised (and depressed) me:
All this painted a pretty bleak picture of entrepreneurship in America for me. Unless you are a job hopping, now unemployed, 40 year old white male who is sick of working for others (yep that stereotype is true) you might as well give up your dream. Sigh.
But the book smartly ended with some recommendations. What businesses are likely to succeed and drive economic growth? More importantly, what should we do? Scott's advice is somewhat like Castor oil - good for you but hard to swallow. Here is a snippet:
A strategy that revolves around increasing the number of new businesses created every year is flawed. Increasing the number of people founding construction firms and hair salons and taxi services that don't do anything innovative isn't going to do us much good. In fact, it might hinder our economic growth because new businesses are, on average, less productive than existing ones.
Instead of believing naively that all entrepreneurship is good, we need to recognize that only a select entrepreneurs will create the businesses that will take people out of poverty, encourage innovation, create jobs, reduce unemployment, make markets more competitive, and enhance economic growth. Therefore, as unfair as it may sound, we need to "stop spreading the peanut butter so thin." We need to recognize that all entrepreneurs are not created equal. We need to think like venture capitalists and concentrate our time and money on extraordinary entrepreneurs and worry less about the typical ones.There is more, much more. Importantly, all of these recommendations tie to decades of data. Get your own copy: The Illusions of Entrepreneurship: The Costly Myths That Entrepreneurs, Investors, and Policy Makers Live By
One of the best perks of my job is the ability to sit in on a variety of classes, especially when guest lecturers or students present. As a student I was one of those people who was always early and always in the front row. Now, I generally sneak in and grab a seat in the back just as class is starting. My office is conveniently located about 20 feet from the classroom. Sitting the back helps me to remember that I am a guest and not a participant.
Last week, David Laube, who serves on the advisory board for the Business School and who literally wrote the Text Book
Apparently there are four key attributes that are desirable to companies recruiting business school graduates. None of these were surprising but the rank order was somewhat remarkable.
The real key here is that communication and presentation skills can make or break your career. Dave told several stories of colleagues whose careers plateaued or crashed and burned due to their inadequate presentation and communication skills. Don't let this be you.
While I'm not going to reiterate his specific presentation advice here (come take his class!), I will share a model he uses to think about communication and presentation. He shared a theory on social styles that I had not seen before. It's similar to Myers Briggs and Insights, both of which I've written about before. 
Apparently all of us develop a preferred style in adolescence. This is innate and cannot be changed. These four types (Analytical, Driver, Amiable, and Expressive) are equally prevalent in the population, with about 25% of us in each quadrant. If you're interested, Dave is a Driver. He leads, and when frustrated becomes autocratic. Most of the scientists I've interacted with are analytical, with a tendency to avoid interaction if pressured.
Interestingly, none of these social styles are correlated to business success.
The important skill is one's ability to be versatile and utilize other styles when needed. If your boss is a Driver, you must start with the summary; get to the point first. Let her ask for facts and data if she wants it. Most importantly, let that person lead your presentation. If your boss is an analytic, you must have FACTS and DATA to back up your presentation. The ability to be versatile and adapt your style depending on your audience is strongly correlated with career success.
Final bit of advice from Dave, tailor your presentation to the most important person in the room. You might need to do your homework to learn his or her preferred communication style but your success will be worth the effort.
Malcolm Gladwell: Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking
Lisa Robyn: The Corporate Dominatrix: Six Roles to Play to Get Your Way at Work
Bob Johansen: Get There Early: Sensing the Future to Compete in the Present
Curtis R. Carlson: Innovation: The Five Disciplines for Creating What Customers Want
Phil Town: Rule #1: The Simple Strategy for Successful Investing in Only 15 Minutes a Week!
Nina Disesa: Seducing the Boys Club: Uncensored Tactics from a Woman at the Top
Susan Roane: How to Work a Room, Revised Edition: Your Essential Guide to Savvy Socializing
Robert I. Sutton: The No Asshole Rule: Building a Civilized Workplace and Surviving One That Isn't
